It can be very frightening to trust that what is through there, through the darkness, on the other side is going to be something wonderful. I think it can be even more of a challenge if in the past, what was on the other side, turned out to be hurtful or damaging to the mind,Continue reading “AFRAID OF WHAT’S THROUGH THERE”
Tag Archives: healing
THAT VERSION OF HER IS DEAD
It has taken a long time but the person I used to be is gone and I will do everything in my power to never let her back. She was so broken from years of unimaginable abuse. That brokenness produced a very angry, hurtful, deceitful person. Her brokenness led her to seek comfort in drugsContinue reading “THAT VERSION OF HER IS DEAD”
AN ESCAPE TO RESET
Sometimes while on the healing journey, you unintentionally go running at full speed into a brick wall. It’s not like you did this on purpose at all. You’re running because you are feeling energetic and excited about the journey, and things are going well. Then all of a sudden out of nowhere, BAM, full forceContinue reading “AN ESCAPE TO RESET”
Sometimes you have to let go
Sometimes you just have to realize that you’re not going to get the support and it’s going to hurt like hell. There comes a point when you have to realize that you have done all you can do to reach out, to be honest, to ask for what you need and you’re just not goingContinue reading “Sometimes you have to let go”
STOP TELLING ME TO GET OVER IT!
Today I find myself rather angry and frustrated with other’s perceptions and thoughts about my recovery journey. I came across this post from Dr. Doyle and just yelled, “YES!” It felt so good and so validating to read something; especially from a professional, that resonated so deeply with me. I am having such a hardContinue reading “STOP TELLING ME TO GET OVER IT!”
YOU’RE THE ONE I TRUST
I wish people understood that when someone opens up to them, it really is about trust. For the better part of my life, I trusted no one. The trauma and abuse I suffered throughout childhood and early adulthood made me shut myself off from the outside world and I honestly did not believe I couldContinue reading “YOU’RE THE ONE I TRUST”
I AM SO MUCH MORE
This quote hits home for me. There are so many horrible events that people could define me by and for the better part of my life I believe they did. For the better part of my life, I believe I was doing the same thing to myself, making it hard for others to see beyondContinue reading “I AM SO MUCH MORE”
EDUCATION NEEDED
As I have been on my healing journey, I have realized that we have a great need for education in our healthcare system. We really need to have far more trauma informed health care providers. Beyond that, there needs to be greater education regarding complex trauma and CPTSD which is far more complicated than someoneContinue reading “EDUCATION NEEDED”
WHAT I MUST TELL MYSELF
Sometimes, surviving recovery seems like a very difficult feat. I have been thinking a lot however, and I am starting to really believe that it is possible. I was fortunate enough to watch my youngest grandson last evening. He is almost five and autistic. He is nonverbal as well. I wanted his parents to beContinue reading “WHAT I MUST TELL MYSELF”
Breaking Patterns
When one grows up in utter chaos, it becomes the norm and all they know. Time goes on and anything other than chaos feels abnormal, wrong or uncomfortable. It seems then, that it would make sense, that if things are going along calmly, some sort of chaos must come into play to have life feelContinue reading “Breaking Patterns”
THEN CAME A GLIMMER
It’s been dark for almost a year now. A shadow following me, always right there, never leaving me. I tried to hide from it, tried to run from it but I couldn’t. The shadow was quite large as it held so much! It held all of my past traumas, it held my deepest fears asContinue reading “THEN CAME A GLIMMER”
The Parentless Parent 